Tag: relationships

Le Sigh

It has been over a month since I last blogged and that blog was paid for. I can’t even blame it on “life” happening because I honestly am not constantly on the go. I do have a steady social life in various mediums and on different settings, but the amount of time I sit at home, on my ass, on this computer doing absolutely nothing but chuckling and ಠ_ಠ on Reddit or YouTube is kind of ridiculous. The most productive thing I’ve managed to do is thoroughly clean my apartment’s living room. It’s seriously so clean, you guys!! I even vacuumed. Yeah, take THAT in.

I haven’t blogged because that means I have to actually think about my life and then I start having minor panic attacks on the inside. Things aren’t serious enough for them to manifest outside of my mind and chest, but I might shed a tear or two. You mean I have to think about the state of my relationship with my (ex)husband? Ew. Or how about the fact that I find my cat so damn annoying lately? I’m plagued by a lot of negative thoughts the past couple of weeks. I’m definitely on a downswing and it seems to coincide with others – or I just shines through more so than anything positive others have to say. There have been an inordinate amount of break-ups the past few weeks, though. That’s sad. I really don’t want to turn this return into a bitch fest, though, so…

Back in mid-April I visited friends & family in L.A. and I went to Six Flags Magic Mountain for the first time in YEARS with my brother and his girlfriend. It was great. They’d just opened the park to weekday use and for being so early in the season, virtually every coaster that was open was walk-on. For having spent so many years having not been on a roller coaster, that was damn amazing.

…

I think I should trademark the heavy sigh. I seem to do it even unintentionally and people wonder what’s wrong. Now that my mind’s gone blank, I’ll just leave this post at… The End.

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I Am Not Amused

If I am being disrespected about the same thing, or from the same source, persistently – even in the form of jesting – I am not laughing or accepting it. It doesn’t matter if you’re my best friend or family. Apparently my mother-in-law and the husband’s (ex) step-mom find it totally okay and appropriate to encourage him to seek a relationship with his ex-girlfriend and in general act like I don’t actually exist as his wife.

I accept that they don’t like me, for both valid and ridiculous reasons. While I never really disliked them, I didn’t take much effort in trying to integrate myself well enough as part of their family. I found it difficult to work against the impression they already had of me and the fact that his family is so much different from mine. All in all, there’s enough on both sides that led to a lack of decent relationship with each other. Needless to say, there’s a lot of fake smiles and niceties that occur when we’re face-to-face. However, I don’t expect I deserve the kind of disrespect they’ve displayed towards me in the past year or so.

As much as I’d weed them out of my life at this point, that’s kind of difficult considering I’m still married to their (step)son, and that won’t change, not in the near future anyway. So they get to deal, I get to deal. At least I can un-friend them from my Facebook and keep them from seeing any possible future things I say that could upset them. *rollseyes*

It does seem that there’s enough going on in my life that I’m not happy about. That’s pretty annoying. I’m thankful that I enjoy work! At least not everything sucks. I have that as an escape, even if it happens to be a bad day at work. It’s only one day and every day is different :)

I’m still suffering with my wisdom tooth. It’s kind of difficult to find a dentist open on the weekend that is accepting patients and takes the right insurance. I’ll have better luck come Monday, hopefully!

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