Tag: husband
I finally met some of my husband’s coworkers. Mostly, they were the younger crowd since the event we attended was for the younger crowd of the union he belongs to through work. It was a barbecue to have coworkers and their families meet and mingle. It was held at the house of one of the union guys and, well, I should say his place was a compound. It was about 45 minutes out from where we live, in the boonies and up in the mountains, but he had 3 horses, a two story house, a detached garage, a LONG ass driveway, a mini-orchard with lemon & orange trees and plenty of room for an add-on for his mother-in-law and a barn that he said he’s working on getting soon. 
It was pretty amazing. Not to mention, the “man cave” that took up the lower level of his house. The sports memorabilia he has in there is beyond wow, even if he is a Giants/49ers fan 
After meeting a bunch of his coworkers, we left and joined a couple at a microbrewery right on the beach in Pacific Beach (PB for short). It actually didn’t take us long to find parking, surprisingly, AND we didn’t have to pay for it either! We partook in the all-you-can-eat crab legs while watching the Lakers kick some Boston ass.
Truth be told, I’m not a basketball fan. Other than the amusement I get out of the injuries sustained from overly-rough fouls and such, I’m just not that interested. I’d rather watch baseball. Speaking of which, the Dodgers kicked Cincinati ass, as well! 12 to nothing! Too bad San Diego won as well so we’re still half a game down from first place 
The husband drank quite a bit of beer, and while he got loud and kind of obnoxious during the end of the Laker game, he was behaving. I had a lot of fun finally socializing out here in SD and meeting new people. I hope I’ll be able to hang out with some of them in the near future 
Although, I will need to get some new friends of my own, as well! Hmm… Time for bed, now… I have work in the morning. I need to make some money after dinner tonight 
Strangely enough, the most romantic moment of my life would probably be the time I was simply spending time, holding hands and walking around various exhibits at the Los Angeles County Faire back with one of my middle school boyfriends. It’s really the simple things that make me happy and satisfy any romance I may be craving. It’s as easy as just being there with me, enjoying the sights, holding my hand with some conversation, to satisfy my want for romance.
To be honest, I can’t remember ever receiving a big romantic gesture, but I appreciate the smaller, almost effortless ones as much. Presenting me with little things that let me know you were thinking of me is big – a favorite drink, snack, candy, a flower… whatever, it doesn’t matter, it makes me happy As the saying goes, it’s the thought that counts!
I’m sad to say that there hasn’t been too much romance since I’ve been with the husband. There’ve been a few things over the course of our relationship that he’s done that has surprised me but in general, I don’t expect a lot in the romance department lol. My mom has the same issue with my dad. Strangely enough, the husband is a LOT like my dad, personality wise so I guess if I can expect it from one, I should expect it from the other 
. It’s kind of sad, but not all guys have that gene, I suppose.
Of course, as any other girl would, I get jealous when I hear about the big (or little) gestures that are made in my friends’ relationships. I’d love to have more of it. BUT, I love my husband and I didn’t come into this relationship under the pretense that he’s a romantic. He has his moments, but overall, it’s not his style 
.
I’m sure there may be something he does that’ll top my romantic day with a middle school boyfriend – after all, we should have the rest of our lives together for it to happen! If not, well, I’ll just make sure to find myself a more romantic guy
I’m pissed and upset. The husband came home drunk off his ass after a meeting and then going to a bar with his coworkers. I hate dealing with him when he’s drunk. Actually, there’s no dealing with him with his drunk ass. At this point, I’ll be happy if he passes out – which I think he has.
Everything’s wrong with that situation. He drove. He was with coworkers who, apparently, were all as drunk as he was so there was no one to be responsible enough to keep him from driving or do anything else stupid. He could’ve been hurt, he could’ve been incarcerated, he could’ve lost his fucking career. The only plus? I’m sober and aware enough that I’m not going to get into anything with him because it would not be productive. Oh, and he didn’t use our money to pay for his current state.
Ugh. This is all sorts of fucked up. What can I do? I guess next time this situation is possible, I’ll be driving his ass wherever. Fucking piece of shit.
I decided that since I finished reading my latest book, I’d go through and read the letters I received from the husband and best friend and others during my time in boot camp and tech school. I don’t think it did me any good, though. It just made me realize how different things are now and not really in a good way.
The letters from the husband were so full of love and want. He put so many little things in the margins and headers – quotes, lyrics, sayings. There were lists of songs he listened to that reminded him of me, and a list of reasons as to why he listened to those songs. It’s so hard to believe that all of that is just… gone. We married as we said we were going to, but when things actually got tough, we were no longer the pillars of strength we promised we would be for one another.
I ended up shattering his trust terribly. Even though I had trust issues with him – at least he hadn’t done what I did. It really all did start with what I did and it’s been all downhill from there.
As far other letters, my best friend was so proud of me for going into the service. She looked up to and supported me. Now, she pokes fun at me. I served in the Air Force and sat in an office chair for the majority of the time. I couldn’t pass my PT test and was discharged because of it and ended up with disability for a few “lame” things. I never saw combat. It hurts.
I feel like I’ve lost all the respect I earned during those months. People thought I was crazy when I mentioned I wanted to join the Air Force, but when I did they were proud of me. I was proud of me. I wasn’t the most amazing Airman, but I made it through when people doubted I could! When I doubted I could! I worked hard at what I accomplished and I was fairly successful during my service, even when my weaknesses caught up with me and proved to be my downfall.
I went in knowing that my physical fitness would always be a hurdle for me to try and get over. I was never a runner and my upper body strength is mediocre at best. It only became too much for me to overcome when I gained so much weight out of nowhere and couldn’t get it off. The only thing I managed to consistently kick butt at was sit-ups.
I kicked butt when it came to the academics. I scored the highest on the academic test in my flight in boot camp. I did consistently above average during my time in tech school (except in the later blocks of training when I had a mediocre instructor or two).
I’ve lost my strength, my sense of self and I’ve lost respect for myself, alongside the respect of others I’m sure (it seems, at least).
I just keep wondering how it all went so wrong? How can I make it right again? I want my happiness back.
